*crying on the floor in the fetal position, damaged and hurt, though the pain is nothing compared to the pain in her heart* But.... but I'm not happy... I hurt you, I should have asked you for that. But he wass my first, and is, was... still a friend. I wasn't thinking about you, you're right, and that's my biggest mistake. I was weak, I was selfish........ and I was wrong... I should have trusted you, I should have listened to you. After you left he tried to seduce me, and in full disclosure I was tempted. really tempted. I don't want to lie to you. But then I thought back to all the memories he and I shared and realized most of them were empty promises and broken dreams. And then I thought of you, how you were always there, no matter what. Always picking me up, all of our moments together, you've never left me standing alone, you never left me crying in a corner, or depressed. No matter what I needed you provided it. You loved me before you had to, and asked for nothing. I'm sorry I didn't give you the one thing you asked of me. I don't expect you to forgive me right away. But please don't abandon me now. I love you, and I'm finally ready to admit, that in some way, I guess I always have.
